Loch Lomond Distillery, Scotland     founded: 1993 | active
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Buttery attic flowers. Caramel keg. Bacony. Fousty wardrobes, hospitals. Army surplus. Dark fungus. Herby mackerel. Bum. The air inside a leather handbag that's not been opened for a while. Cured nun's chuff. My little pony bum. Weird chemicals.

Really oily!!!! Heartburn. Saddle soap. King prawn pathia. Rubbery, like burnt tyres at a drag race. Burnt rubber! Evil medicine. Unwelcome cream. Right juicy. More tasty bacon (cooooked). Velvety, so velvetty. Swedish sauna in the garden. Unfun. There's a nice taste about 2/3rds of the way through. Kinda juicy, mouth watering. Kinda like fruity, like a melon - a Cantaloupe. Really chewy, fizzy (that might be the popping candy) tastes better than it smells I think. Lemony.

Drier than a nun's chuff. Off milk. FIzzy tongue! Drier than a nonce chuff. Sorry, that was perhaps more of a finish. Dry wine, port, sherry, grape shit. Acid reflux. Flippers. Toxic waste - mercifully short. Medium, bad. Oranges. My mouth is numb... Drier than a nun's chuff, again.

So.. what's the chat? Anyone still here? I'm still here! Glittery. CHUFF. Chough. #chuffchuffchuff. Mad, but fun. Reminds me of drinking slightly unpleasant white wine in a lot of ways. Which ways? Be specific. Goes down like a pint of crushed glass. I'd like to subject this to an actual litmus test. Oops, fat-fingered that. I have no idea how something can be so unpleasantly dairy and caustic at the same time. Smells of arse, but tastes nice. Boom. Can I come get my rucksack tomorrow sometime? I've left it in the hall. Dum dum. That was fun.

~£50 (70cl)

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