Kilchoman Distillery, Scotland     founded: 2005 | active
For more detailed mapping of the distilleries in the area from our whisky map page, use this link.

Smells like a pharmacist, fresh laundry. A pharmacist wearing a white coat whilst tarring a road. Smells like an Ardbeg 10yo, but not as good. Kind of flowery, but kind of synthetic-y flowery, like TCP. Maybe some orange? Maybe something? A freshly cut down pine forest. Definitely got the seasidey thing (yep). A salt explosion in the nose, like salted peanuts with a meal in between. Smells like velvet - what does velvet smell like? - old books.

It's not really serious, quite a light smell. First off, a really strong whiff, but mildens down. Nail varnish remover, honestly. Hmmmm (sexual). Mmm, smell it I can, yes. A sweet seaside visit, being on a beach. Like candy floss at a Pleasure Beach theme park. After the fire on Blackpool pier. Smells different after tasting. A little bit like blood, that rusty thing... iodine. Metallic, Metallica? Rocks. Seaweed. Like Hamish's Dark Sabbath.. Black. No, witches' Sabbath.. blood. Like a wet dog, but black pudding is all we could get. I HATE WET DOGS.

So sweet, lovely. Really sweet, delicious. Really nice, like Ardbeg 10yo, but, hahahahahaha. A bit more sweet, but less smoky. The flames have died down, now it's like chocolate. It's got a creamy yeah (a creamy yeah), yeah. Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah. Are you recording this? If it smells like velvet, it tastes like corduroy. I really wish I had a cigar right now. Oooooof. nice without water. Whisky's always better without water. Cointreau. No. not Cointreau (as in, controversial).

A yellow jacket, ginger alert? Only joking. Phil's sexy custard, that was alright. It was pretty good - what, Phil's sexy custard. All I'm getting is pepper. Like sucking charcoal, a campfire. Really intense sugar. Like fruit sweets as the intensity disappears. Calpol / Benylin, a medicinal sweetness. Masking some horrible medicine. Less intense than the Volume suggests - Is this a stupid question? Glucose? Is that like sugar? A simple sugar, maybe Lucozade? More like treacle, really pungent. You get glycerol? Really sharp, pointy sugar. Pointy sugar?

LEAVE WORLD OF WARCRAFT ALONE, FOR GOD'S SAKE! This dragon is level 46, and I'm only a level 3 tree gnome. You'd better not be writing this down.

Being eaten by a squirrel, when are we eating the Tiramisu? Really burny, so good. A bit of a crackle, like popping candy. Kinda fishy, not fishy at all. Fruity, soapy. Bacon on a campfire, with bad cooking utensils - really fired. Shit bacon. Sweet and sour, like a lemon drop. Smoother with water, some negativity, but generally seen to even it out. The fruitiness comes out more, and the sweetness - apples? Sugary hit on the first go, but lessens with continuous attempts.

Slightly spicy, fruit drops. Smooth and long. Somewhere between mental and menthol. (Something I missed) will give you testicular cancer. FROM DOWNNNNTOOOWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNN! Something about a brick - are you still writing everything down? Uh oh, he's gone meta. Stop saying things about saying things...oh shit. Phil is a penis. Hahahahahahaha. You do get that on the finish, don't you? Yeah, like Phil's penis. He's still writing. It just carries on and on.... like Phil's penis?! He's definitely writing that down! "It goes on for miles" (Laura).

Sherbetty finish. Hahahahahaha. Quite tingly on the tongue. Peppery. Not quite the finish-ed product. Nice! (yep) *points to Martin* Like homoeopathic whiskey... the tiniest amount will expand to fill the memory. So strong it hurts your whole family. (wow, fifa quote). Everyone laughs at Phil's penis.

A complex, sweet finish - when it reaches the finish, we're completely drunk. Spicy, sweet, charming. Like a school report, shows good potential. Traffic lighting? This is complicated - we've argues about this for... 10 years? Is it traffic lighting, or... Bobby Pacecar? It gets smokier the longer you leave it. Like holding in a doob. It is really oily-looking, isn't it? Good legs. Good legs, like. Sexy. Leggy, like... leggy long legs. Not Scottish legs, no fake tan. Oooof, heh (unimpressed laugh). Have you lost the ability to see completely? Even with water in, I'm getting quite good legs - quite skinny legs, though. Lessens with continuous attempts.

~£50 (50cl)

The Whisky Exchange - Elements Kh1   |   http://www.thewhiskyexchange.com/P-15201.aspx
Wikipedia: Kilchoman Distillery.   |   http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kilchoman_Distil

We've always scored out of 10 in our group (see number in red box, below), with scores regularly given across that spectrum. The value out of 100 below is adjusted to the scale most commonly used for whisky reviews, to allow for better comparison.

88 / 100